i've learned that calling my mom at 6:30am is the best way to get her to say yes to things. when she hasn't had coffee and makes crucial errors in the argument.

me: thoughts on dying my hair pink? mom: what? me: any thoughts on dying my hair pink? mom: you're in michigan; not berkeley me: exactly. if i were in berekeley it'd be like 'oh hey another girl with pink hair' but in michigan it's like "HEY!! THAT GIRL HAS PINK HAIR!" mom: well there are plenty of other things you could do for attention me: yes. there are PLENTY of far less safe ways for me to seek attention. ftw mom: [quickly] ok dye your hair then. Ahahaha. and now i have permission to dye my hair.

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